Race Factors?

I had to write on this. I’m reading (still reading) Micheal Baisdens book and I’m determined to finish it this weekend. So the main character has a friend that is known for dating ‘Outside his race’ preferably the caucasian race. So he walks in a room and hears his sister and her friends talking about him. He hides quickly and listens in. They are talking about how much of a “Sellout” he is for not dating within his race. Next he says something to himself that is very thought provoking to me.

He goes to say that basically he does not care what race ‘she’ is. As long as she makes him happy and she is fun to be with. He says life is too short to be waiting around for the perfect woman ‘of your race’ to come along. The black women he has dated want to know how much money you make and how much you are willing to spend. (He said that not me) -Now I would like to go off on a quick side note. I was watching this ‘Reality tv show’ and the woman , who happened to be a woman of color went out on a date with a guy. Her words struck me because she said ” the man I date has to make over {Insert insane amount Kim K probably makes per day} a year. The guy needless to say almost spit his food out. Funny tidbit… Back to the book.
He then continues to think to himself , and I quote “ I don’t hear any of the so-called sistahs making a big deal out of the broke or blue collared black men who date outside their race. The focus is always on famous athletes,entertainers,or any brothers who have big bucks.” I’m not trying to read the whole book verbatim on here but the next thing he says is so funny. He basically is like, he has met several smart educated black women that have come into the store and see him with an apron on mopping behind the counter. They paid him no mind. Yet! When they saw his Benz parked out in front and saw that he was “The Owner” their whole attitude changed. Now I’m just playing devils advocate here. I don’t agree with the money issue because I can speak on how “Women” are when it comes to that. It does seem like its not an issue though in the public media until a Famous person does it but thats neither here nor there. I just simply find this issue about dating outside his race amusing and quite/slightly/borderline true in some cases. Why? While I think it is awesome if you have options like that to be able to have the standard “I will only date black men” Hey! And that’s fine. But I do hear too many black women saying why all the white women have to take ‘our’ men. I cannot count the number of debates I’ve had over this subject. It literally grinds my gears to see a woman up in age and lonely that wants a man still single ‘just because’ she wants a black man. Color is just that ‘Color’ and I find it slightly annoying when women boast about it. If they feel like that cool. That does not mean it should be a topic, and its makes the person look very self centered when in the same breath the woe-is-me-I’m-lonely-spiel is heard for the 100th time. I will never forget some advice I overheard my mom and her girlfriends talking about when I was little. You cannot pray to Jehovah for a mate, and then attach stipulations onto it that has nothing to do with the heart condition or what he can do for you spiritually,financially, and emotionally. If he sends you that, who are you to say “But he gotta be 6’4 tall dark and handsome, make over 70k a year, have a 3 bedroom home just in case I want kids etc etc ect. Last time I checked the every type of man belonged to God . Not the black woman. The same way a black man can choose to have a black woman , white woman, Blue woman, hispanic woman; A black woman can do the same. So why judge a black man for his preference? If a black woman wants a black man and will ‘not’ budge even and let me say this loud and clear “Even if the RIGHT one comes along? That needs to be kept locked in the heart. I feel like its needs to be something that is internal . I know many don’t agree , its just all about what is vocally said.

If someone really wants to find happiness they should focus on their happiness and their happiness alone, not how someone else personally finds it.


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